Party of One: The Loner's Manifesto by
Anneli Rufus
pbk out August 03
(Marlowe & Company)
at £9.5
At last - a book which champions the right to solitude. Subtitled The
Loners' Manifesto, this tome tells it like it is. The author intelligently and
entertainingly makes the point that those of us who love to spend time
alone aren't misanthropic or cowardly. Rather, our choice is as valid as
that of the person who prefers to shop, eat and party with a gaggle of
friends.
Indeed, we loners are in good company if that isn't a contradiction in
terms, as the self-contained list includes notables like Leonardo da Vinci,
Franz Kafka, Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton and Greta Garbo. Literary
and scientific figures have an especial need to be alone, to create.
Anneli Rufus also gives lie to the belief that most serial killers are loners.
By looking more closely at their backgrounds she reveals that many of
them are actually pseudoloners, men and women who yearned for
acceptance but were rejected. Hurt and enraged, they turned on the
society which spurned them.
In contrast, those of us who are natural loners don't feel the same need
for societal approval - so we've no need to strike back when that society
smiles at our supposedly eccentric working hours, our lack of interest in
the latest fashion, our un-ironed clothes.
This isn't to say that the loner doesn't suffer. Anneli Rufus points out
what many of us have already discovered to our cost, that the loner's
creative work is often overlooked because people tend to promote their
buddies. We miss out because we don't endlessly socialise - and when we
go against our nature and network we end up drained and can only
recuperate by spending further time alone.
The loner harms no one and demands little of others, yet, Rufus points
out, 'in the playground and the classroom and the office, we are mocked
and feared.' This fear extends to the film industry which endlessly
portrays loners as inadequates or criminals, though it hasn't always been
this way. The cinematic noir hero used to be 'outside, alone, questioning
authority, finding the truth behind surface appearances.'
This book is also a quest for truth - and a successful one. Rufus makes
manifest what many of us have felt on a subliminal level about everything
from public holidays to the majority's overwhelming need for numerous
casual friends. We loners are as valid as social butterflies - so put that Do
Not Disturb sign on the door and settle down for a guilt-free read.
Party of One: The Loner's Manifesto by
Anneli Rufus
