Tangled Web UK Review June 2004
File Updated: 14/06/04

Buy at Amazon Price Dreaming to Some Purpose: The Autobiography of Colin Wilson Dreaming to Some Purpose: The Autobiography of Colin Wilson by Colin Wilson
hbk out June 04 Published by Century at £20

Colin Wilson's autobiography charts a life less ordinary. He left school at sixteen and endured one dead end job after another before eventually deciding to sleep rough in order to find time to write. Funding himself with part time work, he produced the existential opus The Outsider. This turned the twenty six year old into an overnight success. But his lack of humility irritated both critics and journalists, and several of his subsequent books were attacked or ignored.

I was similarly slightly irked by this book whenever Colin suggested that he was a genius. But he ultimately explains it as a form of positive thinking, stating 'I had been telling myself I was a genius since I was a teenager; it was a necessary bulwark against discouragement, as well as being in the best Slavian tradition.'

He sees this positive thinking as the doorway to happiness and refers to it as 'the peak experience.' Conversely, he writes that when feeling angry with his landlord 'I found myself wondering if I had somehow directed a curse at him.'

Like most writers, he has had to work incredibly long hours to make a living and admits that this has led to panic attacks. He sees this as preordained: 'my fate involved being driven to further effort by a demonic overseer.'

I found the New Age explanations in this book unconvincing, but in fairness it's an autobiography rather than a discourse on the supernatural. And on the upside, its 388 pages are never dull. Colin has lectured in Japan, where he is lauded, and has also travelled to Saudi Arabia, France, America and Ireland to give talks and meet his many fans.

He writes honestly about his relationships and prodigious sex drive and overviews his meetings with many other famous writers, including Aldous Huxley, W H Auden and Graham Greene. He even corresponded with Maslow and discussed philosophy with Camus.

On the true crime front, he details his communications with the moors murderer Ian Brady and with Issei Sagawa, the murderous cannibal. He believes that 'Issei was not a monster, but simply a man who, for reasons even he did not understand, had been duped by the sexual illusion.' Colin's wife also decided that Issei Sagawa was 'a delightful man.'

He concludes his autobiography by suggesting that 'ultimately it is the mind that controls what happens to us.' A very strange but interesting read.


( Carol Anne Davis Author of Children Who Kill)

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